I didn’t start this project thinking I would encounter many commentary one-liners and jokes, but I learned if you read enough, even Bible scholars can be funny! These lines have made me laugh:

G. K. Chesterton on the commentaries of Revelation:

“And though St. John saw many strange monsters in his vision, he saw no creature so wild as one of his own commentators.”

D. A. Carson writing about William Mounce’s volume on the Pastoral Epistles in the Word Biblical Commentary series:

“It’s considerable length (641 pp.) gives him space to reflect on pastoral issues. Unfortunately, the reader’s sanctification must endure the irritating format of this series.”

From Thomas Schreiner’s list of recommended Bible commentaries:

Romans: “T. R. Schreiner, BECNT: one of my favorite commentaries”

Galatians: “T. R. Schreiner, ZEC: another family favorite”

1 Peter: “T. R. Schreiner, NAC: preferred by many in my family”

2 Peter/Jude: “T. R. Schreiner, NAC: another one of my favorites”

From 1 Kings: The Wisdom And the Folly (Focus on the Bible) by Dale Ralph Davis

The context concerns the death of the rivals to Solomon’s throne:

“We may wince at the severity this may require, yet there is no getting around it. In my last pastorate I was spending what had been a quiet morning working in my study at the church building. Suddenly, I noticed a bat swooping and swerving beneath the cool glow of the fluorescent lighting. Nothing like this had ever disturbed my study. I had no idea how it had gotten there. The room was only about twelve by twenty feet, so there was no hiding from the intruder. I hastily exited in order to arm myself. In my haste I obtained a dust mop from the church kitchen. That was a mistake, for one swing at the circling bat only filled the air with nasty particles gleaned from dirty floors. I returned again, this time, as I recall, with a broom, with which I at last succeeded in knocking down the bat out of the interior sky. He/she fell stunned on the carpet, where I proceeded with all pastoral authority to beat it to death until bat blood stained the ancient gold carpet. Readers who are bat lovers will be upset with me. Other readers will wonder if I did not, after all, over-react. Why not ignore it with a live-and-let-live policy? But such folks have never had a bat in their studies. And peace came when the bat died.”

Sometimes it is like that and must be like that.Here is 1 Kings 2 it is like that. The security of the kingdom requires the elimination of its enemies. (p. 30-31)

Please send me your commentary humor so I can add to my list: